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Good friends (2)

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Good friends (2)

We all have people we know through various circles - work, church, sports, etc. And many of us have 'friends' and 'followers' on social media. But how many of them would we class as close friends: to share our intimate lives with and ask for help? We all need close friends. We're not supposed to live life on our own; we need the help of others, and they need our help too.

In the perfect world of the Garden of Eden, Adam still couldn't make it by himself, so God said, 'I will make a helper suitable for him' (Genesis 2:18 NIV). It's not about being the most popular; it's about how deep our friendships are. We need friends we can trust and be vulnerable with. The Bible says: 'Some friends don't help, but a true friend is closer than your own family' (Proverbs 18:24 NIV).

When we're going through tough times, it's so helpful to have a close friend facing things alongside us. And it can be even more helpful if that friend has experienced and overcome the things we're going through. And then when we've come out the other side of our troubles, we can be that friend to someone else.

So what now? How can you be a good and loyal friend to others? The Bible asks you to clothe yourself with 'compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience' (Colossians 3:12 NIV). Ask God to help you find close friends and learn how to be a true friend.


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Aug31

Give wholeheartedly

'Wholeheartedness' is about sincerity and commitment. We could describe Abraham that way. He was so God-fearing and committed that he was willing to sacrifice his only son Isaac (see Genesis 22:1-19 for a reminder). That's sincere faith, right there. And when we see how God responded to this kind of faith it's a good reminder of how we should be willing to live. God said, through an angel, that he would certainly bless Abraham (see Genesis 22:17). Then he said, 'You have obeyed me, and so you and your descendants will be a blessing to all nations on earth' (Genesis 22:18 CEV).

When we're willing to go the extra mile for God, he certainly notices. When we learn to live out our faith with heart, he blesses whatever we do for him. Now this doesn't mean that playing in the worship group has a direct correlation to the dollars in our bank balance. It does mean that when we give of ourselves wholeheartedly, living with a generous heart, we'll see God at work and learn to recognise his blessings in many ways.

So what now? Have a wardrobe clear out. Among the too-small shirts and last year's jeans in the discard pile, include something you really like and wear often. If Abraham was prepared to sacrifice his son, you can sacrifice that favourite shirt. Give the clothes to someone who's struggling to buy new ones or, if you don't know anyone who is, take them to a charity shop.

Aug30

Healing close-range pain (2)

It's good and healthy to identify the things weighing on our heart, and commit to working through the painful stuff to experience healing.

What's the next step? The best thing is to admit our pain to God. It could be that once we've acknowledged what's going on inside of us and taken it to him, we feel immediate closure. Often, all we need to 'get over' something is to face it and bring it to God in prayer. God has a way of calming our storms in a moment.

But sometimes he requires us to go deeper to heal our pain. We may need the help and support of others - a trusted, older friend, a pastor, a teacher, a parent. When the hurt goes deep, sometimes the wisdom and perspective of others is just what we need to bring restoration. But then sometimes God knows that our healing will only be complete once we've talked to the person/people/organisation we have the issue with, and told them how we are hurting. God's heart is to bring healing to all people, and it may just be that us confronting the source of our pain is meant to heal them too.

So what now? While you're going through your pain, it is necessary to keep looking outside of yourself. Taking the focus of yourself gives perspective too. If you find yourself in a coffee shop, ask the person next in the queue what coffee they'd like and pay for it. If you don't have the cash to do that, strike up a conversation with them instead. Dare you.

Aug29

Healing close-range pain (1)

In paintballing, it's the close-range shots that hurt the most. It's the same with life stuff: we get wounded if someone close to us, or someone we trust, turns out to be not what we thought or wanted. Betrayal stings (King David felt it - read his story in Psalm 55). Even if we're not the type to admit to feeling 'wounded' when stuff goes wrong, it still affects us. Betrayal and other messy life-stuff throws us off balance.

And, not dealing with pain properly affects our relationship with God. This may be hard to read but... not taking the time to work through our pain separates us from the fullness of God's grace (see Matthew 6:14-15). Also, not dealing with hurt can lead us to not fully trust him. We may not be yelling at the sky, or raging at God, but perhaps we feel distant in our relationship with him. Whether we realise it or not, what hurts in our hearts affects how we relate to God and others.

There's only one thing that fixes close-range pain. Honesty, with God, ourselves and others. It's okay to feel hurt. It's not un-Christian and it's not petty. It's human. And, guess what, we're human. Let's learn to hand over our pain and hard stuff to God.

So what now? Give yourself a heart assessment. Is there anything sitting, undealt with, in your heart? Talk to God about it, 100% honestly. Keep nothing back. Invite him to heal you.

Aug28

Your yes and no

Believe it or not, even people who have decided to live generously are allowed to say 'No'. Great, so we can get out of stacking the chairs at church now? Not exactly. In the last two days, we looked at God's heart for renovation: of us and ultimately the world. Today, let's look at how we still need checks and balances in our God-given mandate to help God make the world a better place.

We can find ourselves in the Christian habit of saying 'Yes' to just about everything we get asked to do, especially when it's at church. Let's get one thing straight, making ourselves available to serve is a great thing: in fact, the Bible says God honours anyone who serves Jesus (John 12:26). But when we say 'Yes' to too many things, we're in danger of giving a half-hearted effort and being less effective. Our priorities become out of whack, and it's our own time with God that usually suffers the most.

If we really do want to press on toward God's goal for us (see Philippians 3:14), we must make sure we're not going to burn out. Reaching out always takes effort. Let's use our Spirit-led desires to discern what we need to say 'Yes' to and what we need to put on a back burner, or even turn down completely.

So what now? Encourage a generous friend today. Take them for coffee and steer the conversation towards how they're doing. Make sure they're not saying 'Yes' to more than they should.

Aug27

God renovations (2)

Yesterday we looked at renovation in us from God. Today we're looking at how God wants to use our renovation for his masterplan for creation. In his word it says that God works in us 'in order to fulfil his good purpose' (Philippians 2:13 NIV). Inviting Jesus into our lives makes us his ambassadors, the ones in this world to translate God's will into action.

The more we seek God, the more we desire him and his purpose. His desires become ours, and they're achieved through the individual and unique talents he's given us. Jesus said 'I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing' (John 15:5 NIV). Our desires must stem from our desire for God. When we seek God, whether it's through his word or time spent in worship or prayer, we learn to listen to God's heart.

'Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart' (Psalm 37:4 NIV). When our heartbeat gets in step with God's heart, amazing, powerful stuff happens, and the world learns about God through us.

So what now? Think about which of the world's problems you'd solve if you could. Plan two actions: make one practical (e.g. if your heart is for the homeless, pray for or give to someone homeless); and the other action political (e.g. write a letter to your MP about improving homeless facilities in your area). Help God to renovate the world.

Aug26

God renovations (1)

Ever watch those daytime TV shows where they try to decorate a house before the owners come back? They're always the same: the stressful middle bit, the overly emotional ending, and at least two 'feature walls'. Our lives can be the same: full of ups and downs, stresses, emotional fallouts, happy outcomes.

We can sometimes be so keen to make ourselves over - to quit that habit, to behave more Jesus-like, to pursue what's holy (all good things) - that we forget it's only possible with God's Spirit. We try it alone, we stress and pressure ourselves to improve, but it's usually temporary change that frustrates us even further.

Just like the makeover shows, God wants to 'renovate' us. Look at what's on offer in Philippians 1:9-11: 'depth of insight', 'pure and blameless', 'filled with the fruit of righteousness.' Sounds kind of huge. But God's the renovation expert. The Holy Spirit is the only one who can renovate and refresh us, and make us more like the Christian we desire to be. When we allow God's Spirit to work on the stuff that we can't, we'll begin to see real and lasting change.

So what now? Think about things that need renovating in your own heart. Then find something to renovate and present to someone else: spruce up something you don't use - a techie or kitchen gadget lying in a drawer, decent clothes you'll never wear - and give it to someone who really will use it. Renovation starts from the heart.